人性的弱點－卡內基的人脈經營術

卡內基成功學經典：人性的弱點 (How to Win Friends & Influence People)

成功學大師卡內基，幾十年來, 他親授人際關係＆溝通技巧的法則,都很實用。嚴格來說, 這些也是權術的應用, 是比較委婉間接的做法, 有異於The 48 laws of power的直接.

***與人相處的技巧Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

-少批評,指責Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.

-多真誠的讚賞Give honest and sincere appreciation.

-投其所好Arouse in the other person an eager want.

*** 使人喜歡你的6種方法 6 Ways to Make People Like You

1能使你處處受歡迎的做法--真實地對別人發生興趣Become genuinely interested in other people.

2給人留下好印象的捷徑--常保微笑Smile.

3如果不這樣做，就是自找麻煩- -記住他的名字Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.  

4成為健談者的簡單訣竅--傾聽，鼓勵談論他們自己 Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. 

5如何引發別人的興趣--就著他的興趣談話。Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.

6如何使別人很快喜歡你- -讓他覺得重要Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.

***如何贏得別人的認同12 Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1你不可能在爭辯中獲勝-贏得辯論的最佳方法，就是勿辯。 The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. 

2必然招致敵人的方式，以及如何避免四處樹敵-尊重對方意見，永遠不要指出他的錯誤。Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”

3勇於承認自己的錯誤-承認錯誤 If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.

4從友善開始-友善的開始。Begin in a friendly way.

5蘇格拉底的祕訣-如何讓對方說“是，是”Get the other person saying ”yes, yes” immediately.

6處理抱怨的萬全之策-讓對方多說話。 Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.

7如何贏得他人的合作-讓對方覺得這主意是他的。 Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers. 

8一個為你創造奇蹟的公式-誠實地站在對方的觀點看事情。Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.  

9每個人都需要的東西-同情對方的意念及欲望。Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.

10每個人都喜歡的訴求-激發對方比較高尚的動機。Appeal to the nobler motives

11. 電影、電視都那麼做，你何不試試呢？-表演你的意念。Dramatize your ideas.

12.當你無計可施，不妨試試這個-拋出下一個挑戰。Throw down a challenge.

*** 影響別人而不冒犯或引起反對的9種方法 9 Ways to Change People Without Giving Offence or Arousing Resentment

1如果一定要批評，請從這裡開始--用稱讚及誠實的欣賞開始。Begin with praise and honest appreciation.

2如何批評才不致招怨 - 讓別人間接地注意自己的錯誤。 Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.  

3先談你自己的錯誤-在批評對方之前先談自己的錯誤。    Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person. 

4沒有人喜歡被命令-提出問題而不直接發出命令。    Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.

5顧全對方的面子-讓對方保存面子。    Let the other person save face.

6如何激勵人們成功 -稱讚最細微的進步，並且稱讚每一個進步。Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”

7給人一個好名聲 -給對方一個活下去的榮譽感。    Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.

8使錯誤看起來容易改正-採用鼓勵，讓人們覺得錯誤容易被改正。 Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.

9使人們樂意做你建議的事-使人們樂意做你建議的事。  Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.